Did you hear that they raised the price of goose feathers last week? Now even the price of down is up!

Then there was the duck that flew upside down. He quacked up.

How about the parrot who always wore a raincoat…she wanted to be Polly unsaturated.

Why did the duck and the goose cross the highway? Because the dusck wanted to take a gander on the other side.

At the equator they feed the chickens ice-cubes so they won’t lay hardboiled eggs!

• As the cow said to the farmer on a cold, winter morning, "Thanks for the warm hand!"

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• Did you hear about the fire at the rabbit hutch Easter morning? There sure were a lot of hot cross bunnies.

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• A cat fell into a copier machine and out came a copycat!

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• A bear climbed to the top of the mountain because he wanted to see what was bruin on the other side.

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• A hen was asked why she stopped in the middle of the road. "Because I'm going to lay it ion the line for you", she said.

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Why did the turtle cross the road?...To get to the Shell Station on the other side!

Of course you heard about the ram who ran over a cliff because he didn’t see the ewe turn.

Then there was a story about the kindest man in the world – he put his shirt on a horse that was scratched!

What did the monkey say when he backed into the lawnmower? “That’s the end of my tail!”

The wife said to her husband, “It’s raining cats and dogs.” “Yes, I know,” he replied, “I just stepped in a poodle!”

What do you call a line of 50 rabbits running backwards? A receding hareline!

Then there’s the guy who kept a dog in the attic so he’d always have a woof over his head.

Did you hear about the chickens who went on strike? They refused to work for chicken feed.

When a fellow was asked how he got splinters in his hands, he said he was trying to catch a timber wolf bare-handed.

Then there’s the guy who growls all day at work and wonders why he goes home dog tired.